Wikipedia:Peer review/George Lazenby/archive1

George Lazenby

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This peer review discussion is closed.

I've listed this article for peer review because I wish to get it to GA, its a level 5 vital article.

Thanks, Questions? four Olifanofmrtennant (she/her) 21:23, 3 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]

You have citations in the lead. Lead is generally to be uncited per MOS:LEADCITE
Several sources are missing author names
Need a thorough copy-edit, I do not think this yet meets criteria one due to poor sentence construction and grammar issues. I am giving it a rudimentary tidy, but at GA these issues would need to be addressed. Consider nominating at the guild of copy editors.
Example: When he was young, he spent 18 months in hospital after having an operation which left him with only half a kidney has been changed by me to read When he was young, he spent 18 months in the hospital after undergoing an operation that left him with only half a kidney.. Lazenby did not "have" an operation, he underwent an operation.
Example: Lazenby has portrayed James Bond several times over the years in numerous parodies and unofficial 007 roles, notably the 1983 television film The Return of the Man from U.N.C.L.E. (in which his character is identified only by the initials J.B.), 1996 video game Fox Hunt,(parts of which were reedited into a feature film) and an episode of The New Alfred Hitchcock Presents, entitled "Diamonds Aren't Forever". - This sentence is far too long to read comfortably. Something like Lazenby has appeared as James Bond in various parodies and unofficial 007 roles, including the 1983 television film "The Return of the Man from U.N.C.L.E." where his character is identified only by the initials J.B., and the 1996 video game "Fox Hunt," parts of which were reedited into a feature film. Additionally, he appeared in an episode of The New Alfred Hitchcock Presents titled "Diamonds Aren't Forever." reads better as does Lazenby has portrayed James Bond in various parodies and unofficial 007 roles, notably appearing as J.B. in the 1983 television film "The Return of the Man from U.N.C.L.E." and contributing to the reediting of parts of the 1996 video game "Fox Hunt" into a feature film. Additionally, he featured in an episode of The New Alfred Hitchcock Presents titled "Diamonds Aren't Forever."
The article is neutral, stable, and well illustrated. So, I recommend going over criteria 1, 2, and 3 more carefully and self assess against these
role of Bond role?? Changed

— MaxnaCarta ( 💬 • 📝 ) 23:52, 3 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for the feedback and I have put in a submission at the WP:GOCE. Other than that I'm going to look over the article. Questions? four Olifanofmrtennant (she/her) 04:37, 4 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]